Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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