It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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