when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
