i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
