Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable

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(703): View more from Virginia

Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket

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(812): View more from Indiana

I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot

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(732): View more from New Jersey

come over i need a lifeguard for my shower

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(678): View more from Georgia

we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch

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(317): View more from Indiana

Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.

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