Kiss
Puke
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
