i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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