Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
