I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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