chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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