i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
