found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
