Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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