So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
