Acid is not a monday night drug
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
should my penis look like a turkey
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
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