you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
is it fun? or sober?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
