The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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