I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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