He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
