Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
