well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
