You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
