I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
