Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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