Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize