oh god the rape fog is back!
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize
