even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
