our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
