please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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