remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
