you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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