I wish you could order shots online.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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