I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
