can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
