I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
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