her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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