i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
