it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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