I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
