imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
last night I used snow as a chaser
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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