I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
The uberlube is also flammable
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
