Kiss
Puke
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
