Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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