Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
