I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
