Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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