We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
