I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
