You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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