that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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